In recent months,in coaching sessions, readings or just general social conversations I have become EXTREMELY aware that people have a very interesting point of view on what forgiveness means. Wikepedia defines foregiveness as follows:
"Forgiveness is the intentional and voluntary process by which a victim undergoes a change in feelings and attitude regarding an offense, lets go of negative emotions such as vengefulness, with an increased ability to wish the offender well."
The only issue I personally have with the definition is that it states "wish the offender well". Society has taught us that forgiveness means 'things are all good' between the parties involved and from a spiritual aspect or an energetic aspect this is not the case.
In the world of energy holding onto hurt, anger, disappointment, resentment or other negative emotions creates an intense energy inside our bodies that is toxic. This energy robs us of our joy, self-esteem, self-confidence and the ability to keep moving forward in life; it literally holds us back and keeps us stuck and it forces us to create negative patterns in our lives over and over and over which rob us of our inner peace and joy.
Forgiveness is NOT saying what the other party or parties involved or even yourself did was "OK". Forgiveness is simply freeing yourself from the negative emotions and patterns that a past event created for you;it is simply owning and taking back your personal power and allowing yourself to move forward in order to enjoy and experience new advenures and avenues in life that the toxic energy was keeping you from doing. Forgivenss releases you from self-doubt, it is the act of allowing yourself to experience JOY in all forms again.
I'm aware that people find the hardest person to forgive is yourself. Maybe you beat yourself up because in a relationship you feel you "should've seen it coming" or maybe you did something that hurt someone else and you feel bad and you begin to punish yourself by harbouring negative thoughts and feelings about the situation. What if you approached each situation as a blessing and decided to forgive yourself? What if behind each action or scenario you that you are harbouring unforgiving energy there was a blessing in disguise and if you chose to see it that way then it would be easier to forgive? What if you had faith that the Universe always had your back and would only ever allow you to enter situations or interactions that are beneficial to your personal growth during your time here on the planet? I know its a tough perspective to grasp, yet it is one that is worth your time to try to learn and commit to.
The energy of "unforgiving" is so toxic and when we store those emotions in our body for too long they start to manifest into physical illnesses. So why would you want to take the risk of hurting your body and robbing your life of joy when you could just choose to feel the emotions, thoughts and feelings of your situation and then let them go and continue on your journey? What if the situation was just a "stop" on your journey - it doesn't mean you have to build a home there.
2016 is suppose to be a year of mastering inner peace. What if your goal was to work on mastering forgiveness? I then wonder how your whole world - inner and outer, would change?